Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Am not evil o!

My last post generated quite some controversy. I got not a few uncomplimentary remarks. Some of the words used to describe my action were:”evil, wicked, senseless, stupid, crazy….”. Its okay, really I don’t mind. You all were only saying it how you felt it, so no wahala!

However, I’d like to say that I am not evil or wicked in anyway. Infact I’m very soft-hearted and kind though my actions on the Desperate E episode may not have shown this.
Maybe am wrong but I don’t feel sorry for what I did anyway, (Oya get ur stones ready and stone princesa,lol!). She asked for it by coming to warn me not to step out of my room and threatening me in the process. I guess my action was more like:
“Oya do your worst!” kinda thing.

Nevertheless am a lot older and wiser now and perhaps if it happened to me now, I’d probably just ignore her and let things be. Just incase the babe come turn Tyson on me, I don too old for rofu-rofu fight now abi?*wink*

I don’t intend for this post to be a ‘Part two’ of the previous one so make I stop here o! Lol!

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I stumbled on this somewhere on the net and thought to share. So Enjoy.

Sometimes when a man says something, it's not really what he means. Here are some of the real meanings behind their words!

"CAN I HELP WITH DINNER?"
Translated: "Why isn't it already on the table?"

"UH HUH," "SURE, HONEY," OR "YES, DEAR"
Translated: Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response.

"IT WOULD TAKE TOO LONG TO EXPLAIN"
Translated: "I have no idea how it works."

"I WAS LISTENING TO YOU. IT'S JUST THAT I HAVE THINGS ON MY MIND."
Translated: "That girl standing on the corner is a real babe."

"TAKE A BREAK HONEY, YOU'RE WORKING TOO HARD."
Translated: "I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner."

"I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT YOU, AND GOT YOU THESE ROSES."
Translated: "The girl selling them on the corner was a real babe."

"OH, DON'T FUSS - I JUST CUT MYSELF, IT'S NO BIG DEAL."
Translated: "I have actually severed a limb, but will bleed to death before I admit that I'm hurt."

"I CAN'T FIND IT."
Translated: "It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I'm completely clueless."

"WHAT DID I DO THIS TIME?"
Translated: "What did you catch me at?"

"I HEARD YOU."
Translated: "I haven't the foggiest clue what you just said, and am hoping desperately that I can fake it well enough so that you don't spend the next three days yelling at me."

"YOU KNOW I COULD NEVER LOVE ANYONE ELSE."
Translated: "I am used to the way you yell at me, and realize it could be worse."

"YOU LOOK TERRIFIC."
Translated: "Oh, God, please don't try on one more outfit, I'm starving."

"I'M NOT LOST. I KNOW EXACTLY WHERE WE ARE."
Translated: "No one will ever see us alive again."


So babes, next time he says any of these, you know exactly what he means,lol!

52 comments:

Obi said...

LOL....consider yourself stoned..!! The comments weren't meant to be "uncomplimentary" abeg...just saying it like it is ooo. And don't worry..I'm sure we all know how "soft hearted" you really are...

This translation list of yours is disturbingly accurate...when do we get a translation for "womens' remarks"..??

UnNaked Soul said...

first!!! shit! second!!! yay!!!

oh shit! how am i suppose to get engaged now! not fair letting our secrets out like that :-P

zerkhezi said...

The translations are funny, maybe even true in some cases. But we mean it sometimes and we don't get credit for those times. As obi said, when do we get a female version?

30+ said...

Wonderful translation, I am tempted to print this post as a reference dictionary. God help the next guy that tells me "I heard you".

Princess you don become Blogcelebrity o 62 comments on the last post alone, that was a hot topic o. As per the noisemakers, nothing do you like you said you are more matured and more careful about keeping your skin colour/texture.

Nyemoni said...

All I can say is LOL...Funny for real, but sometimes it really is as they say..

s.chic said...

I like the way guys are responding and actually admitting to it... sad, but a fact true huh?

With all this power facts, una for make book for blogville oh kpakpando has some interesting "sad, but true" facts up as well...

Queen of My Castle said...

LOL @ unNaked

I loved this post. Men are like little boys, I swear. Even the most mature of them act like children! LOL

The world would be bland and boring without them, though.

Aijay said...

Princesa the evil babe. How now? LOL!!!
This is a funny post... What can I say? Guys will always be guys.

innergrabis said...

Hindsight is 20/20.

"I CAN'T FIND IT."
Translated: "It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I'm completely clueless."
"I HEARD YOU."
Translated: "I haven't the foggiest clue what you just said, and am hoping desperately that I can fake it well enough so that you don't spend the next three days yelling at me."
"YOU KNOW I COULD NEVER LOVE ANYONE ELSE."
Translated: "I am used to the way you yell at me, and realize it could be worse."

Is this my life? lol

princesa said...

@obi, hmmm...so you are the only one stoning abi? NO wahala...your sstones no fit do me natin!
BTW, how do u know how soft-heartd i really am?? See this guy o!

Glad you agree that the guy translation list is accurate. About the women's list, am still searching!

@unnaked,lol! DOnt worry dude, if nobody accepts you, i full ground!

@zerkhezi, okay i agree you guys mean it sometimes but how do we know when those times are now??

@30+, lol! God help that guy,30+ is ready with her dictionary.
Dearie, na real life celeb i want be jare and my skin colour too precious to risk am for desperados o!

@Nyemoni, yes you are right But when person don lie too much, when e talk true, nobody go believe am.

@S.chic, power facts abi? I saw Kpakpa's blog too and it was on point!

@Castle queen, Men are just BIG little boys but i think they are just bland/boring without us women,lol!

@aijay, nsogbu adighi. Okwa i na akpo nwanne gi nwanyi "evil babe".
Am coming over to ur blog to show my evility,lol!

@innergrabis,If you are a guy, then its probably ur life. Why do i get the feeling you are a babe though, am coming over to urs to check that out. Will you let me see??

zerkhezi said...

Dear princesa, the answer to ur question (how do you know when we mean it?) is simple. There is no way u can know if we r sincere or not so u just have to accept it when we say it. But then again, enlightened babes like you never will therefore we will cotinue going round in cirles. boys are not to be trusted girls aren't either. I had a conversation with a girl yesterday, she was telling me how in love she was, fastforwrd 10 min, she's asking me to comeover and spank her for being a naughty girl. But she tells her boyfriend 'I LOVE YOU' all the time. how do u explain that? Human nature. We all say stuff at different times, sometimes we mean them sometimes we don't. There's no way of ever knowing if any1 is truly sincere or not.

darkelcee said...

Yeparipa...Obi actually confirmed these are true? haaaa that is realy B.A.D(lol)

Need to save this for posterity or even start getting familiar with every thing in it.

like the Yoruba proverb...'war (previously heard) no dey kill a smart cripple'

I need to be ready.

Enjoy

classybabe said...

TAKE A BREAK HONEY, YOU'RE WORKING TOO HARD."
Translated: "I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner."-This one really got me cracking,but ironically i will be watching the match with him instead

Olamild said...

hahahhahahahah WAOW

Obinwanne said...

the translations are the bomb, ive just sopied and saved them (copyright).... some of them i can relate to as a man...funny tho

concerning your previous post, i see no reason why anyone should be angry over that post cos its completely your actions and be them in the situation they would have done same or otherwise, but solely depended on who you were then...thank God you said if it happened now, you will just laugh over it...good...


thanks for stopping by....

confused child said...

Girl u know u just planted an evil seed in my mind right? So now that means anytime boo says i look terrific i'll give him a dirty slap.

Atutupoyoyo said...

Abeg carry go. That hoochie had it coming. You even let her off easily sef.

Zephi said...

babes I dont think you are wicked..your rather sweet :)

Zephi said...

buhaaa...that was funny

diary of a G said...

"I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT YOU, AND GOT YOU THESE ROSES."
Translated: "The girl selling them on the corner was a real babe."
lol
P this isn't fair...where is the female's version....guys aint the only ones with tricks up their pants...I aint mad tho, I like
but boy...whats left to impress the girls with? yawl ladies done figured us out

NikkiSab said...

nice post!!

princesa said...

@zerkhezi, thanks for saying am enlightened. I take that as a compliment. I agree that some people are not sincere when they say certain things but i believe there are still those who are REAL,They are just rare.

@darkelcee, abeg get ready my sister so them no go catch you offguard.

@classybabe, lol!That's a smart chic! After the match, the both of you can vacuum together abi?

@olamild, glad i wowed you!

@obinwanne, lol!Copyright infringement!!!

@confused child, abeg o!
I no send you that one my dear. No go slap ur bobo becos of my post o!

@atutu, lol! Let some peeps here no hear that one o! Glad you see it the way i did.

@zephi, thanks for that one dear. It was sweet of you. So you see am no gansta.:)

@DOG, dont worry dude! Ther's so much to impress us with like making dinner and doing the dishes for instance.See... so simple!

@nikkisab, thanks.

Afrobabe said...

22 comments??? shit,when did you write this? work has been so crazy...2 ppl resigned on the same day,a 3rd ones visa ran out and I am doing 4 ppls job with the same pay..now they got someone new I have to train...one albino looking oyibo...let me have a read jare...

Afrobabe said...

"IT WOULD TAKE TOO LONG TO EXPLAIN"
Translated: "I have no idea how it works."

That has to be the best line...they never accept that they don't know sha.

Arewa said...

lol...U got those translations spot on...
As per the replys that u got to ur other post..just shake them off and move on...u were very young then....Anyways have a lovely week and stay blessed x x x x

Positive girl said...

lol.men are the same all over the world.green white or yellow.they can never change.

bighead said...

Yu don't want to start part 2 when I wasn't on part 1? Are yu joking? I'm going to turn this to a series... I'm tempted to withhold my comments on last post's incident but Jesus resisted temptation and so can I.

I think the girl was actually desperate. Considering that you are good-looking, you probably don't know what goes through the mind of such people. Its a daily struggle; trying to convince oneself that God didn't make a mistake or cheat during creation while facing up to the fact that the (potential) toasters are not thinking in the same line with God. That given, I ALMOST understand her desperation. Your response was not as bad as it may have been painted (I didn't read last post's comments). Some girls would have done worse like toast the guy there and then.

Nevertheless, I've learnt one thing (among many others) from my good parents and that is to take the quietest and least troublesome route out of situations. In this case, that would have been to sit in your room and act the fool. Well since it has passed and yu have no knife scars on your back (abi do you?), we can let the matter drop. BTW yu'll now be needing bodyguards (in addition to the driver). I'll be sending an application for that soonest.

These were my stones. Are you bleeding yet?

On today's post, if I tell yu that yu won't understand something, it means there is no way yu would. If I didn't know, I'll say so. Candid drivers are the best, you know.

Jaybabe said...

You right on girl. And can you imagine them saying they are the strongest sex? Strong in what sense really? Mxem! Useless devils!

But then again, rumours are that when a woman says no, she actually means yes! And when she says yes she means no! How deeply true is that?

princesa said...

@afrobabe,See this latecomer o! Oya kneel down, hands up and close ya eyes,lol!

Eh ya , you dey do 4 people work??? Take it easy dear or better still just come back to naija, you'd be lucky to even get one person work over here(pity!)

For guys, i guess they think that any admission of ignorance is weakness.

@arewa dear, i have shaken them off and moved on o!
You have a great week yourself.

princesa said...

@positive girl, lol! Men are men everywhere!

@big head, LMAO!!!
You are just a crazy ass,dude!
See as ur comment long pass my post sef!
Your parents taught you well, the less troublesome route is always the best even (if i didnt take it then, i still know).
Body guard with all those ur certifications?! I fit pay you so???

Those were really soft stones you threw there:)

@jaybabe, yes o!I dont think its really true that a woman means yes when she says no! Am sure the guys think otherwise tho.

lindwee said...

I was here!

Afrobabe said...

Kneeling down...pls tell me to stand up ma...need my knees to look sexy so I can rock that mini skirt I planned for naija,abi they still dey arrest people?

lol@ the lenght of big head's comment I swear it should have been a post on its own.

CATWALQ a.k.a LAGBA-JESS said...

lol....

abeg stoners comot here. Leave my sister with the eyebrows alone...

princesa said...

@lindwee, yes i see you! Thanks for dropping by.

@afrobabe, sweetie mi! You again???
You sure say you get 4 people work???
lol! Dont mind me, i love it when you drop in:).

Oya stand up. Here...have an icecream dear. lol@rockin ur mini skirt in naija. No let aba boys catch you o!

princesa said...

@catwalq,lol! Which one be ur "sister with the eyebrows" again??
Abeg come explain o!

Orientatednaijababe said...

lol!!!!!!i will print this out and use it as a daily reference.....

Sparkle said...

"YOU KNOW I COULD NEVER LOVE ANYONE ELSE."
Translated: "I am used to the way you yell at me, and realize it could be worse."
lol...so true

Afrobabe said...

Infact I am here again again again...lol...love seeing your lovely pics.

zerkhezi said...

hey, i tagged u, pls visit my blog for details

zerkhezi said...

hey, i tagged u, pls visit my blog for details

Unknown Blogger said...

Girl whats up? stopping by to tell you to check out my new blog.

GERALD said...

Hey ur slides are a killer...
I like them lol.

pamelastitch said...

hmmmm....

I know this will get me in trouble again o....

But all those "pop gender jokes" I am not getting them these days..who knows maybe it is life. I got some the other day from a guy, let me post here for you:

Last month, Scientists at University of Pretoria released the results of a recent research that has revealed the presence of female hormones in beer.
The theory is that beer contains female hormones, because hops contain phytoestrogens. As a result, men turn into "women" by drinking too much beer.

To prove this theory, 100 men drank 8 pints of beer each within 1 hour. It was then observed that 100% of the test subjects:
1) Argued over nothing.

2) Refused to apologise when obviously wrong.

3) Gained weight.

4) Talked excessively without making sense.

5) Became overly emotional.

6) Couldn't drive.

7) Failed to think rationally.

8) Had to sit when urinating.

No further testing was considered necessary.

Ejura said...

Things have happened here oh. I'd read yr last post later.
lol at don't fus, it's just a cut.
Men ehn, their pride sometimes no get part two yet they are the biggest babies in the world!Have a great weekend!

fantasy queen said...

and they keep accusing us of being complicated....lol'

princesa said...

@ONB,Hmmm... so you joining 30+ abi? Go on soun!

@sparkle, abi o!

@afrobabe,lol! Now am sure you are in love with moi!:)Thanks.

@zerkhezi, okay dude.

@unknown blogger, okay will do.

@gerald, thanks.

@pammy, lol! This one wey you do post like bighead for my blog...its all good!

These gender jokes sometimes aint funny especially when they are dissing us women,lol!

@ejura, lots have happened dearie. Where have u been sef?? You have a great weekend too.

@fantasy queen, no mind them!

Aijay said...

Howdy.
I've updated o.

cally-waffybabe said...

Girl, please don't beat yourself up about that post and start explaining stuff.
Anybody reading that post knows that it happened a long time ago when you were much younger.
I'm not a stranger to judgemental people, which is why i don't know how to be be judgemental myself.
There was nothing wrong with that post. You were coming from an honest point of view.
Anyway like you said, this isn't part two of that post. I just dropped by to show my girl some love.

Kisses
xxx

Olamild said...

hereeeeeeeeeeeee

The Enigma said...

Quite funny. The desperate E story was both mean and funny. Keep doing it. I mean the blog.

The Enigma said...

By the way, the song I heard when I logged onto your webpage just had me. For lack of a better word, the song wound me. Been a while. Good taste sha.

princesa said...

@aijay, finally girl!!! Coming over soon.

@cally, thanks for looking out for me darling. How you dey??

@olamild, i see you dear.

@enigma, thanks for dropping in. I hope to see you again.