Tuesday, October 30, 2007
However, I’d like to say that I am not evil or wicked in anyway. Infact I’m very soft-hearted and kind though my actions on the Desperate E episode may not have shown this.
Maybe am wrong but I don’t feel sorry for what I did anyway, (Oya get ur stones ready and stone princesa,lol!). She asked for it by coming to warn me not to step out of my room and threatening me in the process. I guess my action was more like:
“Oya do your worst!” kinda thing.
Nevertheless am a lot older and wiser now and perhaps if it happened to me now, I’d probably just ignore her and let things be. Just incase the babe come turn Tyson on me, I don too old for rofu-rofu fight now abi?*wink*
I don’t intend for this post to be a ‘Part two’ of the previous one so make I stop here o! Lol!
I stumbled on this somewhere on the net and thought to share. So Enjoy.
Sometimes when a man says something, it's not really what he means. Here are some of the real meanings behind their words!
"CAN I HELP WITH DINNER?"
Translated: "Why isn't it already on the table?"
"UH HUH," "SURE, HONEY," OR "YES, DEAR"
Translated: Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response.
"IT WOULD TAKE TOO LONG TO EXPLAIN"
Translated: "I have no idea how it works."
"I WAS LISTENING TO YOU. IT'S JUST THAT I HAVE THINGS ON MY MIND."
Translated: "That girl standing on the corner is a real babe."
"TAKE A BREAK HONEY, YOU'RE WORKING TOO HARD."
Translated: "I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner."
"I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT YOU, AND GOT YOU THESE ROSES."
Translated: "The girl selling them on the corner was a real babe."
"OH, DON'T FUSS - I JUST CUT MYSELF, IT'S NO BIG DEAL."
Translated: "I have actually severed a limb, but will bleed to death before I admit that I'm hurt."
"I CAN'T FIND IT."
Translated: "It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I'm completely clueless."
"WHAT DID I DO THIS TIME?"
Translated: "What did you catch me at?"
"I HEARD YOU."
Translated: "I haven't the foggiest clue what you just said, and am hoping desperately that I can fake it well enough so that you don't spend the next three days yelling at me."
"YOU KNOW I COULD NEVER LOVE ANYONE ELSE."
Translated: "I am used to the way you yell at me, and realize it could be worse."
"YOU LOOK TERRIFIC."
Translated: "Oh, God, please don't try on one more outfit, I'm starving."
"I'M NOT LOST. I KNOW EXACTLY WHERE WE ARE."
Translated: "No one will ever see us alive again."
So babes, next time he says any of these, you know exactly what he means,lol!
Thursday, October 25, 2007
Are you that person that’s always stalking your partner, who wants to know where they are or what they are doing each minute and go through their phone contacts and messages every opportunity you get. If you are a babe, you sniff his shirt for the scent of female perfume like one expert Bingo,lol! And for the guys, you sieve through the contents of her bag looking to find God knows what, maybe a complimentary card or a phone number scribbled on a piece of paper. Well just incase you didn’t know, am telling you now: “Girl/Dude you are insecure!!!!”
Emotional insecurity is almost always a function of low self esteem. When you don’t think yourself worthy of your partner’s affection, you begin to doubt their feelings for you and you find yourself always looking over your shoulder for some imaginary (most times) thief trying to steal your man/woman.
Soon you begin to suspect every move your partner makes. When he says he is hanging with the boys, you are already picturing him in Monica’s bed. She says she has to go see her mum and you say Mum ko, Uncle ni!
You start competing with everybody for your partner’s affection and become too possessive. If a babe as much as even smiles at your man, you want to murder her or if a guy says a harmless hello to your babe, you start a fight. That’s the height of insecurity, please get a grip!!!
In most cases you end up losing him/her cos I tell you, its really difficult dealing with a partner with insecurity issues.
All this talk about insecurity reminds me of an incident that happened while I was in the university. I was living off campus in an all girls’ residence and you know how it is when babes live together, there is always jealousy, bickering and chicken fights, lol!
As a fine babe now (at the risk of sounding immodest) I had my fair share of toasters…guys who always came around to visit. Even when you refuse to disclose your address, them go trace you go your house!
Anyway as a result of my numerous toasters, some babes come dey get bad belle for moi. They’d be like: “Na only Princesa de this compound sef wey all the bobos just dey find am come, abi we no be person??” Lol! They never said this to my face though.
Desperate E had recently caught this BIG fish, a guy that lived in
So back to Desperate E and her Big fish. The guy was quite loaded, he always came to visit in a black SUV and appearance wise, he didn’t look bad at all. I no blame Desperate E for wanting to protect her ‘property’ but her actions really surprised me. That day, her bobo came visiting and she had come to my room. The following exchange transpired:
Desperate E: Princesa, I have something to say to you. Me: Yes, what is it?
Me: Yes, what is it?
Desperate E: My boyfriend is around and as long as he I here, I don’t want you o come out of your room. Just stay inside till he is gone.
Me: For what now? Why won’t I come out of my room?? What is my own with your boyfriend???
Me: My name is Princesa, I live in this compound. I’ll like you to know that your girlfriend doesn’t trust you one bit.
Guy: (Surprised, looks at his babe and turns to me) Why do you say that??
Now, Desperate E was now REALLY desperate and she cut in:
Desperate E: (tugging at her man) Darling please don’t mind her, let’s go.
Guy: No, I’ll like to hear what she has to say.
Me: (Smiling Victoriously) Your girlfriend here, came to my room earlier to warn me not to step out of my room till you are gone. She seemed scared that you would leave her for me once you set eyes on me.
From the look on her face, Desperate E was almost pissing in her pants now, her boyfriend was shocked and I was having fun (Evil princesa abi?, lol!). My friends had gathered too and were enjoying the drama.
Guy: Am really sorry about this. Please I apologize on her behalf.
Desperate E: Darling it’s a lie……
Her boyfriend turns to her and gives her a look that shuts her up.
Me: (To the guy), its okay, I just thought I should let you know what your girlfriend thinks about you.
Not long after that incident, I heard the guy left her. I don’t know if that incident contributed to their break up, all I know is that Desperate E was insecure and no one wants that in a relationship, it so damn unsexy!
Friday, October 19, 2007
As I gazed at ur number, I felt this odd compulsion to dial it. I knew in my heart that you wont be at the other end to answer it but I hoped…i just hoped that I would a hear a voice answer “hello” and it would be you. Needless to say, I didn’t hear any voice but it didn’t stop the memories from coming back.
The first time we met, I think it was in an examination hall during my Final year exams. It was Mr. B’s course and he had invited you guys to help invigilate the exam. You were in a different department, i don’t remember what course it was you offered now but I know it was in College of social sciences; same college I was in.
As usual I had written that exam the way I did my other courses. Concentrating on my paper, determined to make an ‘A’ despite the distracting “Princess! Princess!! No. 1?!” that echoed from the mouths of some of my course mates.
On several occasions, I caught you staring at me and I wondered if you suspected I had some ‘Mgbo’(Bullets-local lingo for expo in school) on me and was trying hard to catch me at cheating. I remember thinking then “Stare all you want mister, you wont see nothing!”
Anyway, days after that exam. I learnt from my friend, Ify that you were interested in me. The both of you were friendly and you had confided in her and asked her to tell me too. Later on you would walk up to me, introduce yourself and we would become friends.
I knew what you wanted from day 1. You always said it anytime you got the opportunity. You didn’t only want a relationship; you wanted it to lead to marriage. I liked you but not in the way you wanted. I was in a relationship then but it wasn’t because of that. I just didn’t feel for you like that! I told you how I felt too but you wouldn’t have any of it. You never gave up thinking that one day, if you tried REALLY hard, I would fall in love with you.
I left school. You did too. I came back to Lagos. You left for Abuja but it didn’t stop you from keeping in touch. You called regularly, enquiring about everything going on in my life. Whenever you were in Lagos, you would come to visit me at work. I was doing my youth service then and you would come, sit down in my office and watch me while I worked. You didn’t talk much…you never was a talker anyway! I would glance up to look at you in between work and wonder what was going on in your mind…If you still believed we would end up as husband and wife.
You were also a very giving person. I remember once you had come to visit me. Was it my birthday or what?? Now I really can’t remember. You had bought something for me. It was a trouser suit. Nice trouser suit but not my style. It was one of those suits that tapered thin down the legs. I didn’t wear trouser suits like that. It was also a size bigger than I was. I couldn’t tell you that though I appreciated the gesture, I would never wear the suit. Somehow, you deciphered what I was thinking from my face and you asked me if I would wear it. I had never been a good at hiding my feelings and I couldn’t lie about it so I told you it wasn’t my size and style. You had smiled graciously and said it was okay if I didn’t take it and you would give it to your sister. I was relieved you had not taken it negatively.
Then I started planning a trip to Abuja and you had told me not to worry about accommodation as you would provide a place for me to stay when I came. We had spoken a week before my scheduled trip and you had assured me you were handling things.
You can’t possibly imagine the shock I felt when days later I got that call from Jimmy. He had given it to me straight without trying to sweeten the news:
“Princess, L anwuola!” (Princess, L is dead!).
“It’s a Lie!!!” I shouted in shock. “What happened??”
He went on to tell me his own version of what happened.
You had travelled to Enugu with your elder brother who was a politician. You went cruising in his jeep round the streets of Enugu. You were attacked by armed robbers and they shot you. They ended the promising life of a young man. Some people said they were assassins sent to kill your elder brother and they got you instead. Whatever their reasons were, we may likely never find out but the glaring truth is that you were no more. Never again would I hear your voice and see your face in this life.
I cried, I cried. If tears could raise the dead, surely you would have risen but alas you were gone, never to return. I didn’t go for your burial but I mourned you my own way.
I don’t know where you are or what you are doing right now but I hope and pray that you are resting in the lord’s bosom and that someday we would meet again.
Rest in Peace L.
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
Thank you lord!
I just want to say father thank you!”
This is the song on my lips as I type this post. I urge you all to please sing along with me as I thank the lord for my mum’s successful operation. He has once again proved his faithfulness and that he never abandons those who call upon him.
I also want to say thank you to all of you-my blogville family for all the support and love you gave me (I know I thanked you guys already before but it’s never too much, is it? :)
I had asked for the yesterday off from the office so I could be with my mum. Initially scheduled for 8am, the operation didn’t commence until about 10.30am.
Just before she went into the theatre, the doctor had taken my mum’s blood pressure and it was quite high at 165/80 but he assured us that nothing would go wrong and she would be fine. I wasn’t scared at all (the lord had calmed my spirit), I was only praying that he calm my mum’s blood pressure and take away the spirit of fear from her too.
The operation lasted a long while-almost four hours! The wait wasn’t easy for me at all. I mean dealing with the suspense as the life of someone you care about hangs in the balance is not something anyone should pray to go through I assure you.
Finally around 2pm, she was wheeled out from the theatre. The doctor informed us that the operation had been successful and i was ecstatic with joy !
Still drifting in and out of consciousness as a result of the anaesthesia, she couldn’t recognise me but I didn’t care, I kept talking to her and whispering in her ears until she said aloud: “Stop talking in my ears, I can hear you!”
Lol! ,Now that was the mum I knew…even in her state she still was in control!
Okay so operation done and successful, the next thing is our blogville thanksgiving bash abi??
I humbly hand over that task to mommy, our able official blogville party hostess/caterer. Seeing as the party is to celebrate my mum’s successful operation, who better to organise the party than our very own blogville mommy!
So the party will be at mommy’s house-http://mynameismommy-mommy.blogspot.com/
mommy dearie, i trust that you are up to the task. Let us know the date and time for the party in due time.
Aijay, manda, arewa and oriented naija babe, I ope say una don collect una cloth from tailor o! Unshined congo how far with that bottom box?? Rin Rin no asoebi o!
While we await the party everyone, let’s drink to the successful operation and more happy years ahead for my mum. Pop the champagne! Cheers!!!!
Sunday, October 14, 2007
'HOLIDAY IS COMING,
HOLIDAY IS COMING,
NO MORE MORNING BELLS,
NO MORE TEACHER'S WHIP,
I AM GOING HOME,
MY JOLLY HOLIDAY,
MY JOLLY HOLIDAY.
It was usually sung during the end of term when school was coming to an end. We would march ecstatically from the assembly ground into our classrooms with the song blaring from our lips as we looked forward to the xmas rice, chicken and coke!
Today am not singing 'HOLIDAY IS COMING'. The song on my lips is 'HOLIDAY IS OVER!' and am singing it with a BIG frown on my face!
Last thursday and friday were public holidays cos of the muslim celebrations. Add that to the weekend, and you see i got 4 WHOLE days of rest! I almost forgot what it felt like to wake up early to face Lagos traffic stress.
Poor me,tomorrow again its back to the bump and grind! Can a girl ask for another one week of holiday???
Tomorrow too is the D-day for mumsie's operation,. She checked into the hospital this morning. I intend to go see her later this evening and am taking her some of the delicious rice and stew i prepared this afternoon.Is somebody salivating??? Pele! Its only for my dear mummy and i can share any here. Dont worry sha, RSVP(Rice and stew very plenty) for the thanksgiving bash!
I think am beginning to yarn opata, make i begin go jare.
I go block some peeps blogs before i comot sha.
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
I was very worried and anxious when i typed that posts but after reading ur comments, i felt lots better and hopefull. I am so glad i shared my feelings on this blog. Right now, am having faith that GOd will see my mum through that operation and we shall all celebrate in blogville. maybe i go throw party invite all of una sef,lol! ( i imagine aijay and manda are picking out their dresses already! party freaks,lol!)
I love you all and i REALLY mean it!
Hurray! There is no work tommorow and next!!! Muslims are having their Sallah celebrations so Thursday and Friday have been declared public holidays. Enough grooving abi?? lol! I no get much gist o as i have a meeting in 10 minutes from now and seeing as the previous post was kinda serious, i want this one to be unserious,lol!
I don dey lol too much abi? No mind me jare, the thing dey infectious,lol!
I usually get these mails in my yahoo 360 mail box but this one cracked me up big time. I decided to put it up so you guys can laugh too.
How are you?[woah]Where are you now?In your bed covered with your blancket,hahahaaaaa.don't mind me,I am funny.I like to play,i hope you can understand me.however,I have to disclose to you that anything you like and appreciate,i like it and appreciate it too.My life is very lovely,i live a romantic and a passionate life.But sometimes I try to make myself mean,why?To make me think critically.I lean from quietsm.I like writng and reading mails from my pals here and there.I don't beat around the bush and that is me.My yes is myes and ,my no is my no.
I think about the one i love everyday and dream about my love everynight.I hope you like that.I am, accommodating,say anything you like,I am all ears,I like it.so nice and fine to read your mail.I want to see what you can say regarding this:friends,relatinship,dating and marriage.[Yeh],I really imagine how you would feel about this,moreover,having you,being my eveything.
Invite me for your birthday party,I will come.Come me when you are having your dinner,i will come around and eat together with you,yeh one love.Book me for a tour I will leave my mother,my father,my sisters,my brothers,and my home,go out with you and live with you.well I like clubing and stage dancing,that kind rocking it down,breaking and freaking it,baby!
Just tell me in breif or detailed infomation about how you want it and what you have for me.You know,a loyal friend is as a safe shelter.You are like a dove washed with milk standing beside the flowing brook in the crevice of a rock.I am not flatterying nor kidding.
Invite me to your residence,I desire to show my interest that I want to come.I am fifty fifty.Take care.I am missing you.Whatever a loyal friend can do I can do it.Whatever a lover can do I will do it.I never give up.have a french kiss.I am looking forward to read your mail shortly.
Its unedited. Hilarious abi?
Have fun, am out!
Monday, October 8, 2007
My mum is going in for a surgery. It’s called a hysterectomy. For those who don’t know, a hysterectomy is an operation to remove a woman's uterus (womb).
You may be asking why she needs this surgery. Well its cos she’s had a prolapsed uterus for some years now. I don’t really know how to explain it but I guess it’s a situation where the muscles of the womb kinda collapse or something, the uterus moves from its usual place down into the vagina leading to urinary problems, pelvic pressure, or difficulty with bowel movements.. Now don’t ask me what causes it cos I don’t know!
She ought to have had this surgery ages ago but she is so so scared. I don’t blame her; it’s not me going in for the surgery but am also really scared. My mum has got high blood pressure and there is a risk of patients with that condition to slip into a coma during surgical procedures. I actually lost a friend earlier this year in a similar situation. She had gone in for a caesarean section, the operation was successful and she had birthed the baby only to slip into a coma. The doctors’ explanation was something about a cardiac arrest caused by her high blood pressure. Anyway back to my mum cos that’s who this post is all about.
She woke me up very early one morning some weeks back to say she was ready to go ahead with the operation. To say I was surprised is saying the least. I enquired what brought about the sudden decision to go ahead with the operation and she said she had thought it through and was sure it was the best thing for her since the prolapsed womb gave her a lot of discomfort.
I spoke with a doctor pal who recommended a gynaecologist somewhere in Yaba reputed to be one of the best hands in the field. We met with him, she ran some tests and the surgery was scheduled to be performed today-Monday the 8th of October.
Now, you are probably wondering if she is in the theatre already. No she isn’t! I don’t know if it was a case of cold feet again or what but she called the doctor last Friday to ask that the surgery be moved upwards by a week. Her excuse was that she had malaria and wanted to treat that first before the surgery. So now the surgery has been moved to next week Monday the 15th.
Last Saturday morning, a new twist to this whole surgery business came up.
You see, my mum is a dreamer, as in her dreams usually come to pass. I got that gift from her too but mum wears the crown when it comes to dreaming. I remember once, when I was still in the university. I had fought with this girl during the semester (Not that I am a fighter o! It was one of the few occasions I ever fought in my life. For the record, I detest fighting! I used to live off campus in this compound with some other girls and there was this particular group of babes who felt threatened by my presence. Dem dey vex say na only me the coolest bobos dey find come, lol! Maybe I will blog about these babes and some of their theatrics some time soon). The babe had given me the first slap and there was no way I was going to let it go without retaliating, na so fight come take start o! Anyway I got back home that semester break and the morning after my return during the usual morning devotion, mum had looked at me and asked: “Who did you fight with in school?” I looked at her with my mouth wide open wondering how in God’s name she got to find out that I had fought in school. Initially I thought someone had told her but then I wondered who it could possibly me as my brother who was in the same school as me didn’t even know about the fight. She went on to tell me how she had seen me in a dream fighting with a girl and all that. Meeen! Since dat day I began to respect mumsie and her dreams o! And that’s just one of her very many dreams that has turned out to be true.
Okay so back to Saturday. It turns out that the previous night (Friday night); mum had another one of her dreams. In this dream she had climbed up a height and when she wanted to come down, there was no way for her to. The steps disappeared and in its place was a slippery tiled wall that was impossible to climb down. She pleaded with some people she saw up there that her husband was down the road waiting for her and she needed to go down and meet him but they told her that it was not possible for anyone to leave that place. She was still contemplating jumping down at the risk of breaking her limbs when she woke up from the dream.
Again she slept and had another dream. This time she was with her mother(My late grandma) and they were seated at the back row in a church where a burial service was being held. Her family members were all in the church and she and grandma were commenting on the type of ‘gele’ (headscarf) one of her sisters had on.
She awoke from sleep that morning very anxious and as she told me the dreams, I couldn’t help contracting some of the anxiety too. I mean with my mum’s dream history, who wouldn’t be??? I have told her that maybe we need to rethink the whole surgery idea cos me I never ready to lose my mama yet. She has to be present at my wedding and see her grandchildren first before anything else abeg!
She is anxious. The whole family is worried. It’s like we are caught between the devil and the deep blue sea here. Is it better for her to just go on living with the discomfort of the prolapsed womb or to risk it with the surgery? What do you think guys?
One thing I know for sure is this: I don’t want to lose my mum, Not yet!
God forbid bad thing o!!!
Thursday, October 4, 2007
The truth in the above statement once again came to fore two days ago; some minutes after 9pm on Tuesday night to be exact.
A Tanker carrying PMS(Premium motor spirit), Petrol as most of us know it lost control along Ikorodu road by Stadium bustop in Lagos. The petrol tank oveturned onto the highway and exploded into flames. This was happening in the thick of traffic (you don’t want to know what a typical lagos traffic is like!). Needless to say, several cars, buses and their occupants were roasted alive on that road. These were people headed home to rest after the hustle and bustle of the day. Am quite sure most of them were already imagining themselves in the comfort of their homes (I do that sometimes when am caught in traffic) not knowing that disaster was just a moment away.
On that fateful day at about the same time, I was also caught in traffic (thankfully not on Ikorodu road by stadium bustop) somewhere along Gbagada/Oshodi expressway. I had left the office at about 7pm hoping to get home latest by 8pm. Usually it takes me about 45mins to 1hour to get home and I wasn’t expecting anything different on that day. Unfortunately for me, the traffic on my route was HELL! As at after 9pm, your’s truly was still sweating it out in Lagos traffic. I even dozed off to sleep at some point and hit the bumper of the car in front of me. Thank God nothing happened to the car ( I for pay gbese!) but my darling baby was slightly bruised. Don’t blame me o I was REALLY tired.
After that happened, I needed to keep awake so I turned on the car stereo and tuned into some station that was jamming some cool songs. I soon started bobbing my head to the music and the sleep cleared from my eyes. Suddenly the breaking news came in. A petrol tanker had exploded along Ikorodu road and the fire was raging on furiously. The radio presenter called on the relevant authorities (In this case, Fire service) to act fast and save the lives of people caught in the fuselage. As I listened to the news, I quickly said a prayer for the unfortunate people that were involved and hoped that the Fire Service people would respond rapidly and quell the situation knowing in my heart that was probably a tall wish. Who doesn’t know that in Naija, whenever there is a fire outbreak the fire fighters get to the scene hours after the fire starts sometimes with no water, Pity!)
At that moment, it struck me that it could possibly be me on that bridge fighting for my life(God forbid bad thing sha!). In fact just around me in the traffic were lots of petrol tankers too (seems like they all do their deliveries at night). I wondered what if one of them suddenly lost control, overturned on the road and exploded into flames roasting all of us on that road like it was happening on Ikorodu road at that same time??? The thought that came to my mind was “na only God dey save person o!”. It could be anyone…they were just unfortunate. Can we say it was a case of being in the wrong place at the wrong time or what?
Wednesday morning as I drove to work, I tuned on the radio hoping to hear something about the previous night’s incident. It was there alright in the news and it saddened me to learn that the fire had claimed lots of lives. The innocent lives didn’t stand a chance in that fire explosion. Some had tried to flee their cars in the bid to escape but they still got roasted. These were people’s parents, brothers, sisters, friends, children! Perhaps I even had a friend there!! A pregnant woman was also roasted alive, Terrible!!! And you know the annoying part of it all, the fire fighters who never fail to disappoint showed up one whole hour after the fire started despite the fact that their office is located just a few meters from the scene of the fire.
I write this post with a heavy heart and I’d like everyone reading this to pause for a moment now and say a prayer for the unfortunate souls that perished in that incident.
May their souls rest in prefect peace, Amen.
Tuesday, October 2, 2007
It starts with one meeting, one look between guy and babe. The sparks fly, chemistry strong, a relationship is started. Initially it’s beautiful and wonderful, you live for the moments when you are together, you wonder how you lived before meeting this person and your life looks so bleak when you imagine it without him/her- you don’t even want to think of it!
The days are cheery, the spring is in your steps, the smiles on your face, and you couldn’t be merrier. The hours spent on the phone and the computer seems like minutes.
You pray that this feeling of bliss will never end but alas, this is the real world where (sometimes) good things don’t last and soon you start to notice the changes-small subtle changes at first that you don’t want to accept.
The calls stop coming as frequently as they used too, then it’s a WHOLE day that passes and no call, two days still yet no call. When you call, the phone is not answered, your call is not returned. Reality dawns gradually…something is definitely wrong. Time spent together is now as rare as a white-haired baby, it’s always: “Am busy, busy, busy!” Things have changed and you don’t need a soothsayer to tell you that LOVE IS GONE!
The above scenario painted is very familiar to some of us. Some of us have passed through this road at one point or the other in our life. It’s painful when you suddenly realise that someone you love and who used to love you (Did he/she really?) doesn’t feel the same way about you anymore. You wonder: Was it something you did or didn’t do? Was it simply infatuation which has faded for the other party?? Questions that you may never find answers to. The only thing left to do is to let go and walk hoping to find someone to give you the love you deserve along the way.
Have you loved and lost? How did you know that love was gone?? If you can share, I’d like to know.