Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Wife Candidates & Guilty Couple.

Wife Candidates

Ikenna wanted to get married. He was having trouble choosing among three likely candidates [Ifeoma, Nneka & Ngozi]. He gives each woman a present of N650,000 and watches to see what they do with the money.


Ifeoma does a total make over.She goes to a fancy beauty salon gets her hair done, new make up and buys several new outfits and dresses up very nicely for the man. She tells him that she has done this to be more attractive for him because she loves him so much.

Ikenna was impressed.

Nneka goes shopping to buy the man gifts. She gets him a new set of golf clubs, some new gizmos for his computer, and some expensive clothes. As she presents these gifts, she tells him that she has spent all the money on him because she loves him so much.

Again, the man is impressed.

Ngozi invests the money in the stockmarket. She earns several times the N650, 000. She gives him back his N650,000 and reinvests the remainder in a joint account. She tells him that she wants to save for their future because she loves him so much.

Obviously, Ikenna was impressed.

He thought for a long time about what each woman had done with the money he'd given her.

Then, he married the one with the biggest boobs.

Men are like that, you know. You can never tell what they base their judgement on.

Quality or quantity.

Questions
1. Guys, if you were Ikenna, what would be the yardstick in making your choice? Which of the three would you go for?

2. Babes, if you were one of the 3 candidates. How would you spend your =N=650,000.00?


Guilty Couple
Wife is dreaming in the middle of the night and suddenly shouts: "Up! Quick! My husband is back.

Man gets up, jumps out of the window, hurts himself, and then realizes:

"Damn, I am the husband!"

Who is guilty in this situation?

Comments, anyone?

40 comments:

AN IBO DUDE'S CORNER said...

na me be first oooo

AN IBO DUDE'S CORNER said...

ok

if i be the guy, i keep all three ( but the investor will be first wife)

the second scenario is a win-win (abi na lose-lose) situation. all to blame

princesa said...

@Anibodude, yes o! Oya wear the cap!!
The investor go be first wife,lol.
the ibo man in you talking abi?

Andy said...

Princesa, where did u get these jokes from?
1. For the 3 women, what if the stock market had not paid off? The guy prob. liked them equally and so went for another yardstick.
2. They are both guilty now...a whole day of confession should be good enuff.

classybabe said...

Lol@the guilty couple.They are both guilty but they wife that voiced her husband is back nko,the man can deny and say he was caught off-guard and wasn't thinking straight.No mind me jare they are both guilty

Calabar Gal said...

Both of them are guilty o jare. LOL!!

Aijay said...

Lmao.....They are both guilty!!

Ok, the lawyer in me would argue that some people sleep-talk & say a whole lot of rubbish.
The woman could cover up with that cos she shouted in her dream.
"Up!my husband is coming" Could mean anything.
Maybe she dreamt that she planned a surprise party for him & she was trying to get everyone in place.
The man could say he was startled when the woman shouted.

So, no one is guilty of anything.
Case dismissed!! lol.

Oh, i'll save the money but not in a joint account. He's only a toaster,right? lol.

pamelastitch said...

lol
can i take the original 650,000 naira and my investments and run away...
hehehehe

pammy

A Kel called Wonder ...... said...

lol Me i will invest some Then go on a weekend getaway with the rest, and when i get my returns from the investment i wont give him any. Thats guys 4 u, just cant figure them out.

Ugo Daniels said...

For chosing the 'booby' lady, Ikenna is a mofo..'nuff said

And those couple..Damn! I can't stopn laughing to think of an appropriate answer. LMFAO

Obi said...

Jeez...obviously none of these women commenting here are marriage material...
Stock market babe gets my vote..tho big boobs would DEFINITELY be a plus..
PS: I'm actually more of an ass man myself sha...

princesa said...

LMAO!!!
I was sure i would laugh @ ur comments but guys, u got me rolling on the floor!

@andy,i got them in my mail o! A friend sent them. A day of confession...lol.

@classybabe,ok so can we say the wife is guiltier??lol.

@calabargal, hmmm...ok.

@aijay so u can prove they are both innocent eh? I wont forget to call you when i need a lawyer, :)

@pammy,yes u can dear but u go miss the husband na. U be real sharp babe o!

@a kel, Now thats a sharp selfish babe,lol. Guys will tell you its us babes that are difficult to figure out.

@UgoD,hmmm...mofo ke? So which one you go choose na?

@obi,shuo!they are the real marriage material bo! U want didirin abi??
Ok so stock market babe for you and big boobs to go too,Ha! u even want big ass too. Greedy man!!lol.

@

Ejura said...

In the guilty couple, the guy is most def guilty.aijay got the birthday surprise reason right. No telling how many times he has jumped out the window of his secretary's house. I guess he was even badly injured once while trying to escape but the injury healed before his wife got back from Dubai. Case dismissed.

If i were one of the 650k babes,i'll spend it all on me me me!That way i lose nothing if he goes "booby".But if i love him that much as to be so foolish, i might just get implants
at Modupe Ozolua's beauty spa.

Sisbee said...

After being married for the amount of time I've been married,I will honestly spend the money on my self and invest the rest for ..guess who?...myself! Most good wives have gone through all 3 scenerios at some point in time. Abeg, I don tire.

Sisbee said...

yeah and hypothetically speaking most guys would say the stock market person is the one, but honestly, if the babe no fine nko?.....tell the truth!

SOLOMONSYDELLE said...

Woah!!! Okay, guy marrying the boobs is typical...

As to the guilty couple,, they are both guilty and foolish. I heard on the radio about this guy whose wife found a pair of panties in his car. When confronted, he lied and said that he likes to wear female underwear and just couldn't tell her. This turned his wife on and she went out and got more panties to play 'dress up'. Now, he wants to find a way to stop wearin female undergarments. I say may he continue to dey shame. Amen. May he wear female pata (panty) until the day he dies for cheating on his wife. Useless.

Good post, anyway!

femme said...

ohh i love this, its is so typical. boobs are, and will always be the most important thing in a mans world.

Sparkle said...

Princess I don vex o...u no tell me say u update

LMAO@ the guilty couple...both of them are guilty...d wife dey dream about another man I'm sure...and same thing goes for d husband
yeye couples indeed

Omosewa said...

lmao@ the dreaming woman, lmao. Both of them are guilty mehn.

LOL@choosing boobs over brain.

Olamild said...

hahahahahah

Confessions of a moody crab said...

Lol@ the guilty couple.

For me, I would invest in the stock market and use the remaining money for shopping or going on vac. Joint account ko, joint account ni....lol

I'm selfish...I Know

P.s: Nice blog you have here.

pamelastitch said...

lol....okay, i will get a nice boy toy for a while (i do not want to waste all my money abeg)- maybe someone that has some sexy lips like dbanjs and looks like chidi mokeme....

hehehe...

Friend of God said...

hahaha very interesting..
1. i definitely won't marry based on a lady's method of handling money so my choice might be smilar top ikenna's. A business savy lady can still be evil lol.

2. That couple are in trouble..they are just waisting each other's time.

princesa said...

Laughing some more!!!

@ejura, hmm.. see who finally came back to blogville!
lol! Girl you sabi them or wetin? See as you dey tell their story.
Implants?? That's wise thinking!

@sisbee, good question coming from an EXPERIENCED wifey! Oya guys answer her o!

@solomonsydelle, thanks. Poor cheating guy! His wife really dealt with him sha.If i were him i go wear am comot house then go find one Mr.Biggs joint where i will remove it in their toilet. Of co i go change am before i come back o!,lol.(no mind me)

@femme, abi o and arse too!

@sparkle, sweetie pie! No vex for me o! I just posted and ran away. Didnt have time to do my blog rounds. Oya wetin i go give you now??

@omosewa, yes o! BOTH GUILTY.

@olamild, glad i made you laugh.

@moody crab,thanks and welcome to my blog.

princesa said...

@pammy, Girl you are just a CLOWN!
hmmm... i didnt know Dbanj's lips were sexy o! I go look am well next time.

@FOG,
1.Haba!! Which century u dey brother?!A wife who handles money well is an asset to any man o!

2. Yea they are. But they can change and become more commited, dont you think?

chicala said...

i'l definitely run away with the money, sefini, lol!

Both husband and wife are the same, guilty guilty guilty!

Queen of My Castle said...

LOL...This was really funny. I think I would be the investor chic. Guilty couple, I dunno, that was funny as heck.

Ciao Babe!

princesa said...

@chicala, hmmm....that seems to be the most recurring answer by most of the babes o!
Are our women getting wiser or...??

@Queen of my Castle, investor chic... good.

Queen of My Castle said...

Sorry to leave two comments, but I gotta ask...please don't tell me that you are rocking a corset over that button down top?! If you are I pay homage to you. I like to push the envelope when it comes to style, and I have been digging that trend (Corset over blouse) for quite some time now, but most of the women I know think that it's too risque and sexy. I swear Virgos are the world's greatest trend setters!

princesa said...

@QofC, lol i had to shorten ur name. Its tooo long babes!
Yes i am dear. Rocking my corset!!
I agree Virgoes are da bomb when it comes to style!!!
Rock urs babes, its not bad to be sexy and you can comment as much as you want :).

Sparkle said...

awwww, u new picture is really beautiful...even better than d other ones...u look innocent
lol

I don fix dat problem on my blog o

diary of a G said...

I was here

LonelierThanAkon said...

Interesting, but no surprise to me. It only goes to show that Ikenna is a boob-man.

In his shoes, i'll work it in reverse; pick the one with the biggest ass and give her all 1.95m.

y?
Girls are already pretentious enough. Giving em money to compete for your favour is essentially funding your self-destruction. Dem go just package correct deceit and deliver it intravenously.

Somebody scream sexist!

Atutupoyoyo said...

Like lonelierthanakon said, I would have definitely gone for the one with the biggest ass. It would be the right thing to do

princesa said...

@sparkle, thanks love. Dont be deceived o! Am far from innocent!!lol.

@DOG, I see you dude.Thanks for taking my advice.

@lonelierthanakon, SEXIST!!!!
Ok so arse is your thing? hmmm...i think my arse is big enough , oya go empty ya bank account dash me,lol!!

@atutupoyoyo, another arse man!
BTW.. who give you that name?

Manda said...

i was here, n i am leaving!

Aijay said...

Princesa biko a yo si nam.lol......
Ok, just maka gi, update ga bia very soon. Babes u're a clown. Laughed so hard when I read your comment.
Have a gr8 weekend!

Omosewa said...

Nothing o, my sister, i just took them off. Will be posting another set of opaks later, lawl..

princesa said...

@manda, why leaving so soon love?
U no even comment! I ope say all is well abi are u vexing for me??

@aijay, thanks dear. hurry up with the update o!

@omosewa, why now?!?! I loved one of them soo much! Plzzz put them back o!

Kpakpando said...

OMG, that's hilarious, you never know why someone is making a decision, so just do you. If i was given 650K at this point i'd just pay my bills and call it a day